I'll start things off by telling a random fact about myself. I do not have a best friend (shocker? nah....). It's not because no one wanted to be one (maybe yes, maybe no) but because I chose not to have one. I have this idealism that if I have one, I'd be partially bias as a friend. There would be a ''favored" one among the bunch and because I was born under the zodiac sign Libra, I always strive for balance. It's no paper weight task but I want things fair. One might argue with me because of this piece of thought and I have one and only one thing to tell whomever it would be, MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS.
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| I can never understand how they could tolerate my nasty and bitchy persona. |
When the road is rough and the going is tough, there are those that kept me from slipping into insanity. I owe these people for a lot of reasons and despite my ugly flaws, mood swings, foul mouth and everything in between, they've always been there when I needed a shoulder to cry on, a joke to laugh about and a thought to ponder on. The silence isn't awkward when I am with these folks and for every silent moment I am with them, it feels like it's the best intellectual and heart-felt conversation I had in a long time. You don't get to choose your friends. They're created the way they are so they could do your shitty attitude good. For that, I am truly grateful for having been blessed with the right people to keep me off the bad tracks and this is my way of saying thanks for keeping my sanity intact and for just being there. I really do appreciate even the little efforts they've done for me. That goes too for those whom I could count on anytime and anywhere and those who've made the wrong and haste choice of making friends with me (LOL).
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| A hug is worth a thousand words. A friend is worth more. |
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| A friend is one who knows and loves you just the same - Elbert Hubbard |
And I guess every thanks is accompanied with a sorry so, I'll take this opportunity to apologize for every mean word or act that I said and did not only for the faces that I've placed in this blog but for all those who've considered me as a friend and for all those I've hurt and ignored. I won't deny the fact that there really are those times that dealing with someone like me is arduous, burdensome and extremely exhausting. I am also deeply sorry for those times that I have been insensitive and callous. Of course, I shall be grabbing this chance to warn you guys that it's still is a long way for us so if ever I become so delinquent and evil in the near future, I'm sorry.
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| We may not be the best palls before but thanks for putting up with me now. |
I remember someone told me I don't have friends (the real kind) because of my "attitude problem". I don't know about her but at that moment, I can remember perfectly those faces that have been with me all these years. Take a heed when I say that it's hard being friends with someone like me; go ask these people. Yes, I can be very bossy and demanding and bitchy at times and yes, my honesty is sometimes masked with sarcasm and rudeness but what amazes me is the fact that despite all the mentioned ill traits of mine, there are still those that stood by me through thick and thin. And no matter how pestered they are about my temperaments and tantrums, they still manage to stretch that fine line of patience an extra mile for me. If they aren't "friends", then what could they be?
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| But friendship is a breathing rose, with sweets in every fold. - Oliver Wendell Holmes |
If you ask anyone in my family about my deepest, darkest secrets; perhaps they could never tell you one. I tend to be very secretive and private when it comes to things that I am not comfortable discussing. But whenever I'm with these people, my life is an open book. I can never keep a secret of mine. They know me too well to tell whether I'm down, I'm ecstatic, or if I'm having my monthly period. My true colors are exposed and the most private of my thoughts echoes in their ears. That's how confident I am in giving them my trust in as much as it is difficult for me to place that same confidence in men and strangers. Surprisingly; instead of shunning me away, they've accepted me just the way that I am. They're brutal honesty keeps my feet on the ground and when we have those serious talks, I find the world finally making sense to me.
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| Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend. - Albert Camus |
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| Birds of the same feathers are the same birds right? |
Some say that I'm being complacent when it comes to my friends. Well, I guess it's just the way that I am with those that I consider my "sistahs and brothas from another motha" (trying really hard with the African-American slang) and maybe that's one of the reasons why some people would take advantage of my gullible and naive moments aside from the fact that well, I have quite a glitch in my personality. But so far, none of them failed me (as far as I know). And if ever they did or if they ever will, know that I might get mad (as in really mad) and I might say or do hurtful things but there will always be a room for a talk and a resolution in coming clean (if you know what I mean). And since this thought is heading down the "fight" line, I think it's safe to say that it's normal for friends to have a little of those cat fights and battle scenes. I mean, it makes the whole friendship thing work and last. The fights are definitely worth it. It's risky but it's the only thing that makes you realize how worthy the other person is to you and it makes you feel how important he or she is to your existence (that is if you've really treated each other like real friends do but if not, then it's definitely a waste of time, effort and all that shit).
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| Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls bloom. - Marcel Proust |
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| It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them. - Ralph Waldo Emerson |
The bottom line is that finding a person or a clique that gets you is hard. It's even harder to make the ties and the bond grow stronger as the years go by especially when you've gone separate ways. Relating and understanding each personality is as chaotic as an urban jungle. But as I journeyed through the course of life, John Donne was right. "No man is an island by itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main.." Somehow, there will always be a link between people. A link that knocks upon locked doors and intimidating facades. There are no alpha males or females for there will always be that extra hand willing to reach out and pull you in the right place where being you is perfect and belonging is without any pressure. Therefore, true friends, no matter how hard you've searched the entire universe for one; is worth keeping. Keep them close, cherish them and hold them dear.
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