I read a former classmate's note and I was happy to know of her transformation. After reading her note, I searched the corners of my heart for the same transformation that I wanted for myself.
Unfortunately, what I found was just a vast, empty, cold, dark void.
I would be liar if I say I'm fine with it and that I'll find what I have been looking for soon. I actually feel disappointed, FRUSTRATED.
They say time heals everything. But I guess time is just an intangible concept inapplicable to my situation.
Its like no matter how I try, I keep coming back to the same old comfort zones that I wanted to get rid for a long time now.
Its like no matter how I try, I keep bringing myself to nostalgic moments.
Its like no matter how I try, I keep coming back to you and your memories.
I am not a coward.
I wanted A CHANGE.
But why can I not bring myself to let go of you and let go of the hopes and dreams that I have gyrated inside my head?
Why can I not bring myself to a 360 degree conversion?
I am like a repulsive, dreadful, hideous caterpillar unfit for a metamorphosis.
So to Intet, I am happy for you.
I do not know if we are on the same boat but nonetheless; I am happy that you finally found the courage to stand for a change.
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